Relationships

Note: This is a self-portrait taken a few years ago of my wife of twenty years, Darlene, and I in our backyard in Portland, Oregon. 

I am not sure that I am qualified to address the topic of relationships. On the other hand, based on experience alone, I may have extensive knowledge. If so, I would like to share some of the things about relationships that I have learned along the way.

1) A strong individual makes a strong partner; believe in yourself and seek to grow and learn about being a better partner and friend;
2) Encourage your partner to be strong; to express themselves and to be themselves;
3) Detach and differentiate as much as possible; do not become co-dependent; be independent; share good times together and have good times a part from each other;
3) Be honest, open and communicate; express yourself and listen closely to what your partner is saying.
4) Be loving and express your love in a variety of ways at a variety of moments;
5) Minimize control; seek freedom; encourage individuality; allow for and forgive mistakes;
6) Forgive and forget; move on and move upward always seeking to improve yourself and the relationship;
7) Support each other; minimize negative, critical and abusive behaviors;
8) Be respectful of your partner, their family and their friends;
9) Be willing to apologize and admit your mistakes and shortcomings; seek to grow as an individual and as a partner, and finally
10) Be thankful for having had the opportunity to share your life with a friend, a lover and partner.